around 5 am i woke up in a frenzy. i don't panic easily. but i was close to the brink of complete melt down. i felt like i was drowning. i had a nose full of blood and boogers and a throat full of drainage. i couldn't blow my nose. i couldn't spit anything out. the worst part was that i couldn't physically keep my lips open to let air in or out. i had two swollen and numb lips that were not acting the way i wanted them to. i just sat up in bed and held my bottom lip with my fingers for about 30 minutes while i tried to gather myself. eventually stuff drained enough that i could breath a little thru my nose. i was so exhausted and finally was able to go back to sleep for a couple hours. i can't explain how uncomfortable and scary that was.
so when i said earlier to get what you can of the afrin in your nose, i meant it. you can't really snort i up after you squeeze it in there. and you can't pinch the opposite nostril closed when you take it. so it;s a battle but worth any bit that you can get in your nose. i will be using it right before i go to bed tonight for sure.during the day i also used the saline rinse nose spray to help loosen up the blood clots. it's so weird though. hurts like hell to touch my nose. but i would give anything to just blow it.
today also stated the pill taking adventure. the rubber bands holding my jaws together have just enough give that i can open my mouth about a quarter of an inch if i really try. it feels extremely odd to have to have the tension. i also can't feel my mouth so i have no idea if i am actually opening my mouth. so odd. i figured out that i need to look in the mirror to see how open my mouth is and then shove in the pill. so add that to the list if things you will need... a mirror.
as if pill taking is easy - i have to take all these steroid pills. it is a little daunting. i sat there this morning for quite some time getting enough courage to actually take the first one. it takes serious commitment to put the pill in knowing that it could possibly get stuck in my throat. or it not go down the first try. then i would have been stuck with a gross dissolving pill on my tongue. aaaggghh. so i had the syringe completely full of water just in case. i also had my mom standing by in case i needed help. i was so scared. but i did it. geez. i had such anxiety.
one weird thing that i also am dealing with is the roof of my mouth really hurts. you know when you eat something too hot, like pizza. and you burn your roof? well times that by about a hundred. and when you swallow there is a small portion of the roof close to the front that is extremely tender. when you take big gulps there is a huge jabbing pain. i can feel it all the up near my nose. so little sips of water for now.
we spent the day reading the fun little cookbook the surgeon gave me. it's full of recipes to drink after jaw surgery. mom is excited about all the options. she keeps digging thru the pantry and telling me all these things she wants to try making. for lunch she made me some corn and cream of chicken soup. pretty good.
we cut the rubber tube tip of the second syringe so the opening is wider. we can now use it for the creamy foods. i left the other one with a small opening for drinking liquids.
here's a picture of my favorite place. i have taken up residency here. sippy cups, Kleenex box, lip balm, lap top, iPad mini and comfy pillows. 
i continued my face icing. but today i just opted for holding the packs in place. i could get them closer to my nose and kinda molded them to fit in around my cheeks. mom just had to tell me when my 20 minutes was up. i couldn't really see anything. haha
i got a couple great flower arrangements today. they seriously brightened my day. it's funny how much some flowers can cheer you up. mom rearrange some things in the living room so we can display them where i could see them while in my favorite spot.
the first arrangement was from the ladies at my orthodontist's office. they are so great. so friendly and seem to actually care about me as a person, not just some patient handing over thousands of dollars to get my teeth fixed. 
the next arrangement came from my co-workers. the card made me laugh. the flowers are absolutely beautiful. so colorful. my co-workers also sent an iTunes card. YAY. i got a subscription to one of my favorite magazines. i was reading it today. but started laughing. it had recipes for healthy food i can't eat and exercise routines that i cant do... for now at least. :) the iTunes card was a great idea. lots of things to buy to help pass the time for these next two weeks.
my granny and pa-pa came by for a quick visit. she had pa-pa cut some of her gardenia flowers for me. she also hand-made a get-well card. too cute. she had to dig out crayons and make it colorful. very thoughtful. :)
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