1/30 - flair and light bulb

so... I was looking thru an old jewelry box yesterday for something and found this lovely pin. I nearly lost it. I laughed so hard. I remember wearing that on my blue jean jacket back in middle school. man, I've come a long way. :)

(see y'all... it's pays off to save every little thing. haha. pack-rats rule!)

side bar- had one of those light bulb moments tonight. as many of you know I have a serious cheese addiction. the bulb went bright while reviewing a local Mexican food menu tonight in preparation for ordering pick-up for tomorrow's dinner. (blaming this one on Olivia!) I won't be able to enjoy my cheesy happiness for a while after they break my jaw. aggghhh. so, I need to find some sort of cheese soup recipe and/or really good canned soup. any suggestions? I have time to perfect this. I will add this to my "find good soups" mission.

1/29 - pain and weird dreams

so... I decided to try to eat a turkey burger today at lunch without cutting it up. well, lets just say that I won't be doing that again in a long time. my teeth hurt. the only thing that I can say to help anyone understand this pain... you know after you ride your bike 50+ miles and your quads hurt like hell two days later?? well my teeth/gums hurt like I rode 50+ miles. and the pain-day of, no waiting for the fun. geez. it's the little things I suppose. lets just say a knife and fork is where it's at.

now, onto my weird dream. so I wake up last night in a terrible night sweat. I was dreaming about my surgery. I envisioned the surgeon coming at me with a giant needle and saying "oh this will help with the pain".... OMG. he proceeded to do his thing with all sorts of crazy sharp surgeon tools and such. the whole time I was completely awake. I clearly remember the weird pain I had when he shot my cheeks full of medicine. it was supposed to numb everything. I don't remember feeling pain. but I remember everything else. I can still hear the saw sound and bone crunching sounds. i could hear the screwdriver driving in the plate screws. I can even sorta feel him pulling this gnarly thread thru my gums in his effort to sew me up.

man. I woke up in a serious sweat and freak-out state. I can only be thankful that I didn't take any sleeping aids before I went to my slumber state. who knows. I probably wouldn't have been able to wake up. aggh. that would have been insane. no telling what that crazy doctor would have done.

and now... off to try to sleep. I'm brave. ha-ha. I got this!

1/21 - word of the day... tension

so, every have a constant pressure or dull ache all day long?? well I have... for days, no weeks now. I don't want to say I'm over it or anything. because I know it will get worse. but geez. I honestly can't remember the last time since I got my braces that I have had zero pressure/pain.

based on this revelation I have decided that today's special word is tension. there is a whole lot of it going on in my mouth.

today's picture can help explain why I believe I am having so much "tension" lately. see the very back top tooth? well the wire used to arch upwards to where the bracket is. now it isn't as arched anymore. so I guess that tooth is not only being aligned in preparation for post surgical alignment, it's also being brought down and rotated a bit.

yay for tension. makes for a bright an cheery day for sure!!

1/20 - pink chomp tool

so when I got my braces the orthodontist gave me a bag of tools. there were all sorts of brushing, flossing and dental hygiene things. there was one thing that I kinda laughed at. she showed me a pink rubber U shaped "tool" to be used as a teether. she said that it can help with all the pressure and pain that I will experience. my teeth can get stronger by chewing on it. since the teeth are being forced to move they are basically unhappy. that unhappiness hurts. haha

it's weird that chewing on pretty normal things can hurt. some days are better than others for some reason. some areas are more sensitive as well. but it is what it is. two month down...

and for those who want to see what braces teether looks like, here it is. 

 

1/16 - two month mark!

today marks my two month "anniversary" of getting braces. two months into the 12-month adventure. i've learned a lot over the past two months:

1) when the orthodontist said my teeth are going to get worse before they get better, she wasn't lying. the gap in the front is different.
2) there are teeth that now touch when i close my mouth that didn't touch before
3) that i want to punch everyone that says, "oh, you got braces"-  i didn't get braces, i committed to having my jaw broken. i committed to having brackets and screws added to my face
4) a sign of not drinking enough water is when i wake up and my cheeks are oddly embedded into the bracket/wore
5) i still can't chew very well.
6) braces hurt. i didn't remember them hurting this bad before. maybe the fact that i am an adult instead of a young person has something to do with it.
7) i am officially scared. but will manage. i know this is all worth it.

umm... i could go on. i'll save some for later. 

1/12 - tator tots = hard

how's this for an update - tried to eat tator tots.

That was tough. It’s amazing how sensitive my teeth are. I normally could have mowed thru the potato greatness. Nope, not today. slow and steady. once again this makes me a little sad.

i really like tator tots.

1/11 - soup plan

i decided that i need to get my head around having a liquid diet. i am always one that prepares and plans like crazy. so there is no exception with this journey.

long story short, i am going to try to eat soup at least once a week from now until may. that way i can find some that i really like. i am a pretty picky eater. i don't want to be figuring out which tomato soup is the best with my teeth wired shut and a numb face.

i also am thinking about the week prior. i might start to ween myself off solid foods. i think that my belly and my mind will probably be a little happier. quitting solid foods cold turkey sounds really hard.

first soup up on my list is a tomato soup - Campbell's 100% natural. and i have to say, it's pretty yummy.

1/8 - $$$$$$$$

no pictures today. just a little update of my mental state!

so i had a mini freak-out today. i talked to my surgeon's insurance coordinator. she told me what the cost of the surgery will be. they have to document the surgeon's treatment plan then submit it all to my insurance. then they take about a month to review my case and inform me and my surgeon how much they will cover. then it's up to me to pay the remaining balance.

the total she quoted me includes all of his services, his assistant surgeon, scans, tests, my splint and post-op appointments. i then also have to pay the hospital fees. i won't know those until about a month prior to the actual surgery.

the reason i am freaking out is that i am seriously committed to this. no turning back.

and for those wonder what it costs to have your upper jaw professional broken... $12,000. and the best part is that the surgery has to be paid for all up front. so i have until may to get that figured out. 

oh, and then there is the cost of braces. don't forget that tid-bit. luckily they have a payment plan that doesn't charge any interest or anything. and my insurance only covers $1000 of the total orthodontist fees. better than nothing i guess. :)

after all this is done, i could have bought a new car. but i am going to try my best not to get too hung up on the dollar amounts. there is always a solution. just need to sort it all out.

so i am asking everyone to cross their fingers, say a little prayer and send any good-feeling vibes my way.

1/4 - turkey o’toole

I decided to have a little belated birthday gathering - bennigan’s followed by some bowling.

I am so happy about eating my ultimate favorite thing… a turkey o’toole.

I swear I can drink that special honey Dijon sauce. Drink it I tell you. maybe i can get enough to fill a sippy cup after my surgery. hmmm. got to give that some thought later.

of course I had to cut it all up. to tear into just isn’t an option. But I managed. Then I managed to eat a hot fudge brownie sundae after. Whoo hoo!